Where's the Naps?

Remember the old commercial with the old woman who received her sandwich and immediately asked "Where's the beef?" Well, I'm the mom who immediately after receiving her adorable infant is asking "Where's the naps?" Shouldn't babies come equipped to nap for long uninterrupted stretches of time? Seriously, if someone said to me "Here, lay down in this soft bed. I'll cover you with a blanket, make the room dark and turn on a whirring sound machine. Sleep for as long as you want. And while you are sleeping, I'll do the laundry for you, clean up the house, and be prepared to feed you when you wake up. You don't worry about a thing."...I would so take the offer, no questions asked. I might even stay in the bed after I woke up, quietly enjoying the solitude. But not my babies. They are hard wired to resist sleeping at regular intervals throughout the day. Cambel was like this. Practically from birth he was a bad napper. So I did what every good first time mother does. I panicked, and bought a book to tell me how to get him to sleep. "The Baby Whisperer" told me to pat and shush. So I patted and I shushed until I thought my lips would stay permanently in the shushing position. I watched the clock and raced in at 45 minutes to try to help him stay asleep. I wrote down when he ate and slept to try to determine a pattern. I developed a nap routine. I joined the Baby Whisperer message boards and asked endless questions. And once in awhile, it worked, and I rejoiced. And then at 9 months, when all my hard work to teach Cambel to nap long and independently should have been paying off, I was rocking him to sleep everyday for his nap--a cardinal sin by Baby Whisperer standards. (This of course was after my options had been narrowed down to two choices: strap him down with duct tape so that he couldn't stand up in his crib and keep himself awake, or rock him to sleep. I chose the lesser of the two evils). 

So when Ada was born I announced to myself and whoever happened to be within earshot that I was not patting or shushing this time. She would have to figure it out herself. Yes, she cried some, but for the most part, it seemed that she was going to do what Cambel so rarely did--nap. Alas, it is not so. Even as I write this, she is awake after what was a very short nap, her second actually of the day, one of many in her resume of short and inconsistent naps. 

I think what bothers me most about the napping issue is the unpredictability of it all. At least if you are only going to take a short nap, dear child, tell me so that I don't get my hopes up. And when you are going to throw in a marathon nap out of nowhere, just let me know, so that I can sleep too and not sit in anxious anticipation waiting for you to wake up.  Yes, once again my angst centers around the issue of control. If only I could control this small cute thing. 

I know of people who don't have this need for control, who therefore don't worry about how long their kids' naps are. They don't make any sort of obvious effort to get them on a routine. In fact, they often blatantly ignore their child's need to nap. And ironically, I think their kids nap better than mine, proving once again that life is inherently unfair. 

As a stay-at-home mom, these are the kinds of things I find myself praying about; "Help me to know how to help Cambel when he melting down for no reason, remind me how important it is to fill the glass "a lot" with water so that Cambel doesn't panic, help me to know how to get Ada to nap." Although I know that God cares about all these things, I have the distinct impression that He is either saying "no" or He is choosing to delay His answer for an indefinite period of time. Or perhaps He has answered, through the voice of the now three year old Cambel. After I finally relented and got Ada out of her bed  earlier today when she should have been sleeping, Cambel informed me in a very motherly way (and even with an air of superiority?) "I think she need hold mommy. Yeah, she needs hold." 

Aahh, where was this wisdom 3 years ago?